Please solve this puzzle!

Why can't he shut his mouth?

Beware of these fleshy creatures!

I don’t know when and how I befriended this bespectacled creature, but obviously I was not protecting him from the occasional summer winds. He still needs protection from any kind of winds as there is always a risk of being blown away. But it’s not intentional on the part of wind as it’s very difficult to figure out something which has hardly any volume. I guess he used to cling to me as I was noticeable from miles apart. Now, please don’t jump to this conclusion that I am one of those guys in your office or college who walks away with all the attention of the opposite sex. (Kids in school, please excuse. It’s not time to think of attention. Grow hair first.) But eyeballs roll whenever I’m around and it’s irrespective of sexual preferences. After all size does matter, it may be pleasant (read bliss) or a big pain (you know where!).

Despite these eye-catching contradictions in volume, we seemed inseparable. At least, in movie halls and outside college campus. We were intelligent enough to understand that we had no bright future in matters related creatures that used to excite us with the explicitly visible extra flesh on a particular zone of their bodies. (I still wonder why the same amount of flesh, if grown a little lower, turns so repulsive.) So we never got close to these mysterious elements and preferred to observe them from a safe distance. And this distance paid off! We were eternally ecstatic!

After more than a decade we realise how foolish it was on our part to keep aside that wisdom of our youth and let ourselves carried away by these fleshy creatures. Now for all those uninitiated I describe this situation a la advertisements of weight-loss centres.

Before: We laughed together
After: We cry together

Moral of the story: Beware of these fleshy creatures

Lost dreams

Though I have not experienced it myself, I can very well understand the trauma of being labelled as an unemployed youth. In fact, it sounds an oxymoron to me as there’s no youthfulness left in unemployment. I guess the great Lord has always been nice to me and you cannot argue with me when I say that despite being idle for most of my life, I have been suitably employed. It’s always an achievement to get generously paid for almost doing nothing. And that has been my only achievement till date.

Now that you realise that I’m left with no work, it’s obvious that I have mastered the art of keeping myself busy with issues, which is no one’s business. For instance, I did a survey on those who do nothing a la me and sadly don’t get paid too. Amazingly 99.99 per cent of them get up late in the morning. You know why?

They have hijacked all the beautiful dreams in the world! Now you know why you often come up with the most horrible dreams that scare the hell out of you. I’m planning to request the government to heavily tax these souls as it’s unfair that they are still hoping that the best is yet to come.

Unfortunately we have lost hope!

That’s the problem we have been facing for a while. We have exhausted all our dreams or lost them halfway on our mad rush towards something, which we are also not sure of. Where is the charm of an uncertain future? We almost know what’ll happen to our lives tomorrow provided the good Lord doesn’t have any specific design for us.

It’s time we jostle ourselves up from the cosy comforts of our jobs and get mad!

Ehshas me hai awarapan, jism me hai pagalpan…yun hota to kya hota